Can you survive in sexless marriage

Tuesday, June 28th, 2022 10:20 | By
Soar marriage. Photo/Courtesy

If love-making was absent in your relationship, would you still describe yourself as a happy couple? How close will you feel to your partner if you don’t bond sexually with them?

A sexless marriage only works if both partners have similar levels of desire and the same understanding of the role that sex plays in their relationship. If the marriage is more of a business partnership or a child-rearing partnership, the couple may not bother about sex. According to sex therapist Celeste Hirschman, a marriage can last long term without sex if both people do not value sex. Otherwise, a cold bed can lead to hurt feelings, increased resentment and emotional detachment.

Physical intimacy is powerful and results in the bonding of two people in ways that few other activities can. Studies show that it’s not the sex itself, but the affection that accompanies sexuality between partners. What makes the difference is the everyday touching, hugging and kissing between couples.

A sexless marriage is not as likely to survive long term when the individual enters the relationship expecting to share sexual desire, attraction, passion and connection together. This is what differentiates a romantic relationship from a friendship.

The relationship may also not survive happily if the two partners have mismatched libidos. This is because the partner with the higher libido may feel constantly rejected. The partner with the lower libido may also feel inadequate in meeting their partner’s sexual needs. They may also shame their higher libido partner for wanting sex too much. If the lack of sex is because of deeper relationship problems, this could mean that the relationship is on its deathbed.

Some couples don’t mind a marriage without sex. If it’s not a problem for the couple, then a sexless marriage isn’t a problem.

Sometimes a couple stops being able to have sex due to health conditions, ageing, an increase in caregiving responsibilities, or other factors that can’t necessarily be “fixed.”

But even in these situations, couples can learn to accept the lack of sex over time because they love their partner and everything else about their relationship.

They can also enjoy forms of physical intimacy and sexual touch that don’t revolve around intercourse but are still very sexy, pleasurable, and connective.

More on Lifestyle