Dowry should never ever put lovers asunder
Recently, Meru elders (Njuri Ncheke) announced plans to regulate what they termed absurdly high bride prices demanded by in-laws.
Well, if there’s one thing that has been abused and misused in today’s generation, it is dowry. Traditionally, in most African communities there were no unnecessary demands made on the groom-to-be. In fact, it was the pride of the groom and his family to pay a lot of dowry as a sign of how much they appreciated the girl they were taking and also to show off how rich they were. On the other hand, it was the pride of the girl to be told how many cows were paid for her bride price.
Today, dowry has been turned into an opportunity to milk the young man or make him and his family pay back all that the girl’s family has invested in her.
There’s nothing wrong with paying dowry. It should be a token of appreciation and honour for the bride’s parents and not a business transaction. They say noone ever paid dowry in full because it is the beginning of strong ties between a man and his future in-laws. By making demands on dowry, what we simply do is creating enemity between the two families right from the beginning and making things difficult for the bride as she will always be resented by her in-laws if not husband for what her people did.
True, you cannot put a price on anyone whether educated or not. Every human being is priceless and valuable and must be treated as such. As a married man, I value my wife more than anything else precious to me. The reason two people come together and want to stay together is because of their love for one another. That love cannot be bought by anything and nothing, including dowry, should not put asunder what God puts together.
